Hello! I am back!
Like finally.
Long hiatus due to a 1-month long work trip.
Funny how good I actually feel now after the work trip. Haha. I am a workaholic. So as I get busy with work, it becomes easier to forget the heartache. Because of that I also stop texting weird texts to my ex because I simply don't have the time to. Still taking the initiative to text him because I don't want to lose a friend. Not sure if he still wants to be friends though. :(
Ok, so as the title above probably already revealed, I drunk texted him. Haha. So much for saying that I have stopped sending weird texts to him.
So it happened during the last few days of my work trip. We had a dinner to celebrate the end of the successful trip and I had some drinks with my colleagues. And to my horror, I sent him a text reading "I miss you", followed by many stupid monkey emoticons covering his ears when my ex replied me. Yes, the chat was filled with that stupid monkey emoticon the next morning when I checked my phone.
Did I remember sending him a text? Yes, though not clearly. Did I know what I was sending? I think I did. Did I intend to tell him about how I feel? No, that was never the intention. At least not in my conscious mind.
So what did I find out through this incident? The funny thing is, I wasn't completely conked out when I sent the text. People say that alcohol makes you reveal your true thoughts you never know. I say alcohol gives you the courage to do the things you didn't dare to when you are sober. Thinking back, I did not text him because I was absolutely drunk and was uttering nonsense. I texted him while still semi-sober, but with a weird sense of bravery and adrenaline the alcohol had induced in me.
Did I appreciate what my alcohol-induced bravery had done? Not really. It made things awkward for a while and made me fear that I would lose a friend and a role model forever. And thinking back, I don't really want to revive this relationship right now. I don't want to do anything that keeps looking back. With time comes many realisations.
Enough heartache for the time being, I just want to move on and heal. Saw this interesting image online; I don't want to have a Franky heart so I will let my heart take a rest for now.
Ok enough rambling from me for now. I will still continue to reflect on the healing road and hopefully help some broken souls out there to heal together with me. For now, a song that I couldn't stop listening for the past one month:
Happy Happier weekend.
-j
Like finally.
Long hiatus due to a 1-month long work trip.
Funny how good I actually feel now after the work trip. Haha. I am a workaholic. So as I get busy with work, it becomes easier to forget the heartache. Because of that I also stop texting weird texts to my ex because I simply don't have the time to. Still taking the initiative to text him because I don't want to lose a friend. Not sure if he still wants to be friends though. :(
Ok, so as the title above probably already revealed, I drunk texted him. Haha. So much for saying that I have stopped sending weird texts to him.
So it happened during the last few days of my work trip. We had a dinner to celebrate the end of the successful trip and I had some drinks with my colleagues. And to my horror, I sent him a text reading "I miss you", followed by many stupid monkey emoticons covering his ears when my ex replied me. Yes, the chat was filled with that stupid monkey emoticon the next morning when I checked my phone.
Did I remember sending him a text? Yes, though not clearly. Did I know what I was sending? I think I did. Did I intend to tell him about how I feel? No, that was never the intention. At least not in my conscious mind.
So what did I find out through this incident? The funny thing is, I wasn't completely conked out when I sent the text. People say that alcohol makes you reveal your true thoughts you never know. I say alcohol gives you the courage to do the things you didn't dare to when you are sober. Thinking back, I did not text him because I was absolutely drunk and was uttering nonsense. I texted him while still semi-sober, but with a weird sense of bravery and adrenaline the alcohol had induced in me.
Did I appreciate what my alcohol-induced bravery had done? Not really. It made things awkward for a while and made me fear that I would lose a friend and a role model forever. And thinking back, I don't really want to revive this relationship right now. I don't want to do anything that keeps looking back. With time comes many realisations.
 |
| "Maybe we'll meet again, when we are slightly older and our minds less hectic, and I'll be right for you and you'll be right for me. But right now, I am chaos to your thoughts and you are poison to my heart." |
Enough heartache for the time being, I just want to move on and heal. Saw this interesting image online; I don't want to have a Franky heart so I will let my heart take a rest for now.
 | ||
| Heart like a bitten apple now. Next up, Franky in the house. |
Ok enough rambling from me for now. I will still continue to reflect on the healing road and hopefully help some broken souls out there to heal together with me. For now, a song that I couldn't stop listening for the past one month:
-j
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